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Mrs. SHAMELA ANDREWS.
Mrs. SHAMELA ANDREWS.
In which, the many notorious FALSHOODS and MISREPRSENTATIONS of a
Are exposed and refuted; and all the matchless ARTS of that young
Politician, set in a true and just Light.
A full Account of all that passed between her and Parson _Arthur
Williams_; whose Character is represented in a manner something
different from that which he bears in _PAMELA_. The whole being exact
Copies of authentick Papers delivered to the Editor.
Necessary to be had in all FAMILIES.
By Mr. _CONNY KEYBER_.
Printed for A. Dodd, at the _Peacock_, without _Temple-bar_.
M. DCC. XLI.
To Miss _Fanny_, _&c._
It will be naturally expected, that when I write the Life of
_Shamela_, I should dedicate it to some young Lady, whose Wit and
Beauty might be the proper Subject of a Comparison with the Heroine
of my Piece. This, those, who see I have done it in prefixing your
Name to my Work, will much more confirmedly expect me to do; and,
indeed, your Character would enable me to run some Length into a
Parallel, tho' you, nor any one else, are at all like the matchless
You see, Madam, I have some Value for your Good-nature, when in a
Dedication, which is properly a Panegyrick, I speak against, not for
you; but I remember it is a Life which I am presenting you, and why
should I expose my Veracity to any Hazard in the Front of the Work,
considering what I have done in the Body. Indeed, I wish it was
possible to write a Dedication, and get any thing by it, without one
Word of Flattery; but since it is not, come on, and I hope to shew my
Delicacy at least in the Compliments I intend to pay you.
_First_, then, Madam, I must tell the World, that you have tickled up
and brightned many Strokes in this Work by your Pencil.
_Secondly_, You have intimately conversed with me, one of the
greatest Wits and Scholars of my Age.
_Thirdly_, You keep very good Hours, and frequently spend an useful
Day before others begin to enjoy it. This I will take my Oath on; for
I am admitted to your Presence in a Morning before other People's
Servants are up; when I have constantly found you reading in good
Books; and if ever I have drawn you upon me, I have always felt you
_Fourthly_, You have a Virtue which enables you to rise early and
study hard, and that is, forbearing to over-eat yourself, and this in
spite of all the luscious Temptations of Puddings and Custards,
exciting the Brute (as Dr. _Woodward_ calls it) to rebel. This is a
Virtue which I can greatly admire, though I much question whether I
could imitate it.
_Fifthly_, A Circumstance greatly to your Honour, that by means of
your extraordinary Merit and Beauty; you was carried into the
Ball-Room at the _Bath_, by the discerning Mr. _Nash_; before the Age
that other young Ladies generally arrived at that Honour, and while
your Mamma herself existed in her perfect Bloom. Here you was
observed in Dancing to balance your Body exactly, and to weigh every
Motion with the exact and equal Measure of Time and Tune; and though
you sometimes made a false Step, by leaning too much to one Side; yet
every body said you would one time or other, dance perfectly well,
_Sixthly_, I cannot forbear mentioning those pretty little Sonnets,
and sprightly Compositions, which though they came from you with so
much Ease, might be mentioned to the Praise of a great or grave
And now, Madam, I have done with you; it only remains to pay my
Acknowledgments to an Author, whose Stile I have exactly followed in
this Life, it being the properest for Biography. The Reader, I
believe, easily guesses, I mean _Euclid's Elements_; it was _Euclid_
who taught me to write. It is you, Madam, who pay me for Writing.
Therefore I am to both,
_A most Obedient, and_
_obliged humble Servant_,
The EDITOR to _Himself_.
However you came by the excellent _Shamela_, out with it, without
Fear or Favour, Dedication and all; believe me, it will go through
many Editions, be translated into all Languages, read in all Nations
and Ages, and to say a bold Word, it will do more good than the
_C----y_ have done harm in the World,
_I am, Sir,_
_Sincerely your Well-wisher_,
JOHN PUFF, _Esq; to the_ EDITOR.
I have read your _Shamela_ through and through, and a most inimitable
Performance it is. Who is he, what is he that could write so
excellent a Book? he must be doubtless most agreeable to the Age, and
to _his Honour_ himself; for he is able to draw every thing to
Perfection but Virtue. Whoever the Author be, he hath one of the
worst and most fashionable Hearts in the World, and I would recommend
to him, in his next Performance, to undertake the Life of _his
Honour_. For he who drew the Character of Parson _Williams_, is equal
to the Task; nay he seems to have little more to do than to pull off
the Parson's Gown, and _that_ which makes him so agreeable to
_Shamela_, and the Cap will fit.
_I am, Sir,_
_Your humble Servant_,
_Note_, Reader, several other COMMENDATORY LETTERS and COPIES OF
VERSES will be prepared against the NEXT EDITION.
For the LIFE of
Mrs. SHAMELA ANDREWS.
_Parson_ TICKLETEXT _to Parson_ OLIVER.
Herewith I transmit you a Copy of sweet, dear, pretty _Pamela_, a
little Book which this Winter hath produced, of which, I make no
doubt, you have already heard mention from some of your Neighbouring
Clergy; for we have made it our common Business here, not only to cry
it up, but to preach it up likewise: The Pulpit, as well as the
Coffee-house, hath resounded with its Praise, and it is expected
shortly, that his L--p will recommend it in a ---- Letter to our
And this Example, I am confident, will be imitated by all our Cloth
in the Country: For besides speaking well of a Brother, in the
Character of the Reverend Mr. _Williams_, the useful and truly
religious Doctrine of _Grace_ is every where inculcated.
This Book is the “SOUL of _Religion_, Good-Breeding, Discretion,
Good-Nature, Wit, Fancy, Fine Thought, and Morality. There is an
Ease, a natural Air, a dignified Simplicity, and MEASURED FULLNESS in
it, that RESEMBLING LIFE, OUT-GLOWS IT. The Author hath reconciled
the _pleasing_ to the _proper_; the Thought is every where exactly
cloathed by the Expression; and becomes its Dress as _roundly_ and as
close as _Pamela_ her Country Habit; or _as she doth her no Habit_,
when modest Beauty seeks to hide itself, by casting off the Pride of
Ornament, and displays itself without any Covering;” which it
frequently doth in this admirable Work, and presents Images to the
Reader, which the coldest Zealot cannot read without Emotion.
For my own Part (and, I believe, I may say the same of all the Clergy
of my Acquaintance) “I have done nothing but read it to others, and
hear others again read it to me, ever since it came into my Hands;
and I find I am like to do nothing else, for I know not how long yet
to come: because if I lay the Book down _it comes after me_. When it
has dwelt all Day long upon the Ear, it takes Possession all Night of
the Fancy. It hath Witchcraft in every Page of it.----Oh! I feel an
Emotion even while I am relating this: Methinks I see _Pamela_ at
this Instant, with all the Pride of Ornament cast off.
“Little Book, charming _Pamela_, get thee gone; face the World, in
which thou wilt find nothing like thyself.” Happy would it be for
Mankind, if all other Books were burnt, that we might do nothing but
read thee all Day, and dream of thee all Night. Thou alone art
sufficient to teach us as much Morality as we want. Dost thou not
teach us to pray, to sing Psalms, and to honour the Clergy? Are not
these the whole Duty of Man? Forgive me, O Author of _Pamela_,
mentioning the Name of a Book so unequal to thine: But, now I think
of it, who is the Author, where is he, what is he, that hath hitherto
been able to hide such an encircling, all-mastering Spirit, “he
possesses every Quality that Art could have charm'd by: yet hath lent
it to and concealed it in Nature. The Comprehensiveness of his
Imagination must be truly prodigious! It has stretched out this
diminutive mere Grain of Mustard-seed (a poor Girl's little, _&c._)
into a Resemblance of that Heaven, which the best of good Books has
compared it to.”
To be short, this Book will live to the Age of the Patriarchs, and
like them will carry on the good Work many hundreds of Years hence,
among our Posterity, who will not HESITATE their Esteem with
Restraint. If the _Romans_ granted Exemptions to Men who begat a
_few_ Children for the Republick, what Distinction (if Policy and we
should ever be reconciled) should we find to reward this Father of
Millions, which are to owe Formation to the future Effect of his
Influence.----I feel another Emotion.
As soon as you have read this yourself five or six Times over (which
may possibly happen within a Week) I desire you would give it to my
little God-Daughter, as a Present from me. This being the only
Education we intend henceforth to give our Daughters. And pray let
your Servant-Maids read it over, or read it to them. Both your self
and the neighbouring Clergy, will supply yourselves for the Pulpit
from the Book-sellers, as soon as the fourth Edition is published. I
_Your most humble Servant_,
_Parson_ OLIVER _to Parson_ TICKLETEXT.
I Received the Favour of yours with the inclosed Book, and really
must own myself sorry, to see the Report I have heard of an
epidemical Phrenzy now raging in Town, confirmed in the Person of my
If I had not known your Hand, I should, from the Sentiments and Stile
of the Letter, have imagined it to have come from the Author of the
famous Apology, which was sent me last Summer; and on my reading the
remarkable Paragraph of _measured Fulness, that resembling Life
out-glows it_, to a young Baronet, he cry'd out, _C----ly C----b--r_
by G----. But I have since observed, that this, as well as many other
Expressions in your Letter, was borrowed from those remarkable
Epistles, which the Author, or the Editor hath prefix'd to the second
Edition which you send me of his Book.
Is it possible that you or any of your Function can be in earnest, or
think the Cause of Religion, or Morality, can want such slender
Support? God forbid they should. As for Honour to the Clergy, I am
sorry to see them so solicitous about it; for if worldly Honour be
meant, it is what their Predecessors in the pure and primitive Age,
never had or sought. Indeed the secure Satisfaction of a good
Conscience, the Approbation of the Wise and Good, (which, never were
or will be the Generality of Mankind) and the extatick Pleasure of
contemplating, that their Ways are acceptable to the Great Creator of
the Universe, will always attend those, who really deserve these
Blessings: But for worldly Honours, they are often the Purchase of
Force and Fraud, we sometimes see them in an eminent Degree possessed
by Men, who are notorious for Luxury, Pride, Cruelty, Treachery, and
the most abandoned Prostitution; Wretches who are ready to invent and
maintain Schemes repugnant to the Interest, the Liberty, and the
Happiness of Mankind, not to supply their Necessities, or even
Conveniencies, but to pamper their Avarice and Ambition. And if this
be the Road to worldly Honours, God forbid the Clergy should be even
suspected of walking in it.
The History of _Pamela_ I was acquainted with long before I received
it from you, from my Neighbourhood to the Scene of Action. Indeed I
was in hopes that young Woman would have contented herself with the
Good-fortune she hath attained; and rather suffered her little Arts
to have been forgotten than have revived their Remembrance, and
endeavoured by perverting and misrepresenting Facts to be thought to
deserve what she now enjoys: for though we do not imagine her the
Author of the Narrative itself, yet we must suppose the Instructions
were given by her, as well as the Reward, to the Composer. Who that
is, though you so earnestly require of me, I shall leave you to guess
from that _Ciceronian_ Eloquence, with which the Work abounds; and
that excellent Knack of making every Character amiable, which he lays
his hands on.
But before I send you some Papers relating to this Matter, which will
set _Pamela_ and some others in a very different Light, than that in
which they appear in the printed Book, I must beg leave to make some
few Remarks on the Book itself, and its Tendency, (admitting it to be
a true Relation,) towards improving Morality, or doing any good,
either to the present Age, or Posterity: which when I have done, I
shall, I flatter myself, stand excused from delivering it, either
into the hands of my Daughter, or my Servant-Maid.
The Instruction which it conveys to Servant-Maids, is, I think, very
plainly this, To look out for their Masters as sharp as they can. The
Consequences of which will be, besides Neglect of their Business, and
the using all manner of Means to come at Ornaments of their Persons,
that if the Master is not a Fool, they will be debauched by him; and
if he is a Fool, they will marry him. Neither of which, I apprehend,
my good Friend, we desire should be the Case of our Sons.
And notwithstanding our Author's Professions of Modesty, which in my
Youth I have heard at the Beginning of an Epilogue, I cannot agree
that my Daughter should entertain herself with some of his Pictures;
which I do not expect to be contemplated without Emotion, unless by
one of my Age and Temper, who can see the Girl lie on her Back, with
one Arm round Mrs. _Jewkes_ and the other round the Squire, naked in
Bed, with his Hand on her Breasts, _&c._ with as much Indifference as
I read any other Page in the whole Novel. But surely this, and some
other Descriptions, will not be put into the hands of his Daughter by
any wise Man, though I believe it will be difficult for him to keep
them from her; especially if the Clergy in Town have cried and
preached it up as you say.
But, my Friend, the whole Narrative is such a Misrepresentation of
Facts, such a Perversion of Truth, as you will, I am perswaded,
agree, as soon as you have perused the Papers I now inclose to you,
that I hope you or some other well-disposed Person, will communicate
these Papers to the Publick, that this little Jade may not impose on
the World, as she hath on her Master.
The true name of this Wench was SHAMELA, and not _Pamela_, as she
stiles herself. Her Father had in his Youth the Misfortune to appear
in no good Light at the _Old-Bailey_; he afterwards served in the
Capacity of a Drummer in one of the _Scotch_ Regiments in the _Dutch_
Service; where being drummed out, he came over to _England_, and
turned Informer against several Persons on the late Gin-Act; and
becoming acquainted with an Hostler at an Inn, where a _Scotch_
Gentleman's Horses stood, he hath at last by his Interest obtain'd a
pretty snug Place in the _Custom-house_. Her Mother sold Oranges in
the Play-House; and whether she was married to her Father or no, I
never could learn.
* * * * *
After this short Introduction, the rest of her History will appear in
the following Letters, which I assure you are authentick.
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to Mrs._ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS _at her
Lodgings at the_ Fan _and_ Pepper-Box _in_ Drury-Lane.
This comes to acquaint you, that I shall set out in the Waggon on
_Monday_, desiring you to commodate me with a Ludgin, as near you as
possible, in _Coulstin's-Court_, or _Wild-Street_, or somewhere
thereabouts; pray let it be handsome, and not above two Stories high:
For Parson _Williams_ hath promised to visit me when he comes to
Town, and I have got a good many fine Cloaths of the Old Put my
Mistress's, who died a wil ago; and I beleve Mrs. _Jervis_ will come
along with me, for she says she would like to keep a House somewhere
about _Short's-Gardens_, or towards _Queen-Street_; and if there was
convenience for a _Bannio_, she should like it the better; but that
she will settle herself when she comes to Town.----_O! How I long to
be in the Balconey at the Old House_----so no more at present from
_Your affectionate Daughter_,
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
O what News, since I writ my last! the young Squire hath been here,
and as sure as a Gun he hath taken a Fancy to me; _Pamela_, says he,
(for so I am called here) you was a great Favourite of your late
Mistress's; yes, an't please your Honour; says I; and I believe you
deserved it, says he; thank your Honour for your good Opinion, says
I; and then he took me by the Hand, and I pretended to be shy: Laud,
says I, Sir, I hope you don't intend to be rude; no, says he, my
Dear, and then he kissed me, 'till he took away my breath----and I
pretended to be Angry, and to get away, and then he kissed me again,
and breathed very short, and looked very silly; and by Ill-Luck Mrs.
_Jervis_ came in, and had like to have spoiled Sport.----_How
troublesome is such Interruption!_ You shall hear now soon, for I
shall not come away yet, so I rest,
_Your affectionate Daughter_,
HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS _to_ SHAMELA ANDREWS.
Your last Letter hath put me into a great hurry of Spirits, for you
have a very difficult Part to act. I hope you will remember your Slip
with Parson _Williams_, and not be guilty of any more such Folly.
Truly, a Girl who hath once known what is what, is in the highest
Degree inexcusable if she respects her _Digressions_; but a Hint of
this is sufficient. When Mrs. _Jervis_ thinks of coming to Town, I
believe I can procure her a good House, and fit for the Business; so
_Your affectionate Mother_,
HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
Marry come up, good Madam, the Mother had never looked into the Oven
for her Daughter, if she had not been there herself. I shall never
have done if you upbraid me with having had a small One by _Arthur
Williams_, when you yourself--but I say no more. _O! What fine Times
when the Kettle calls the Pot._ Let me do what I will, I say my
Prayers as often as another, and I read in good Books, as often as I
have Leisure; and Parson _William_ says, that will make amends.--So
no more, but I rest
_Your afflicted Daughter_,
HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS _to_ SHAMELA ANDREWS.
Why will you give such way to your Passion? How could you imagine I
should be such a Simpleton, as to upbraid thee with being thy
Mother's own Daughter! When I advised you not to be guilty of Folly,
I meant no more than that you should take care to be well paid
before-hand, and not trust to Promises, which a Man seldom keeps,
after he hath had his wicked Will. And seeing you have a rich Fool to
deal with, your not making a good Market will be the more
inexcusable; indeed, with such Gentlemen as Parson _Williams_, there
is more to be said; for they have nothing to give, and are commonly
otherwise the best sort of Men. I am glad to hear you read good
Books, pray continue so to do. I have inclosed you one of Mr.
_Whitefield's_ Sermons, and also the Dealings with him, and am
_Your affectionate Mother_,
HENRIETTA MARIA, _&c._
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
O Madam, I have strange Things to tell you! As I was reading in that
charming Book about the Dealings, in comes my Master--to be sure he
is a precious One. _Pamela_, says he, what Book is that, I warrant
you _Rochester's_ Poems.--No, forsooth, says I, as pertly as I could;
why how now Saucy Chops, Boldface, says he--Mighty pretty Words, says
I, pert again.--Yes (says he) you are a d--d, impudent, stinking,
cursed, confounded Jade, and I have a great Mind to kick your A----.
You, kiss ---- says I. A-gad, says he, and so I will; with that he
caught me in his Arms, and kissed me till he made my Face all over
Fire. Now this served purely you know, to put upon the Fool for
Anger. O! What precious Fools Men are! And so I flung from him in a
mighty Rage, and pretended as how I would go out at the Door; but
when I came to the End of the Room, I stood still, and my Master
cryed out, Hussy, Slut, Saucebox, Boldface, come hither----Yes to be
sure, says I; why don't you come, says he; what should I come for
says I; if you don't come to me, I'll come to you, says he; I shan't
come to you I assure you, says I. Upon which he run up, caught me in
his Arms, and flung me upon a Chair, and began to offer to touch my
Under-Petticoat. Sir, says I, you had better not offer to be rude;
well, says he, no more I won't then; and away he went out of the
Room. I was so mad to be sure I could have cry'd.
_Oh what a prodigious Vexation it is to a Woman to be made a Fool
Mrs. _Jervis_ who had been without, harkening, now came to me. She
burst into a violent Laugh the Moment she came in. Well, says she, as
soon as she could speak, I have Reason to bless myself that I am an
Old Woman. Ah Child! if you had known the Jolly Blades of my Age, you
would not have been left in the lurch in this manner. Dear Mrs.
_Jervis_, says I, don't laugh at one; and to be sure I was a little
angry With her.----Come, says she, my dear Honeysuckle, I have one
Game to play for you; he shall see you in Bed; he shall, my little
Rosebud, he shall see those pretty, little, white, round,
panting----and offer'd to pull off my Handkerchief.--Fie, Mrs.
_Jervis_, says I, you make me blush, and upon my Fackins, I believe
she did: She went on thus. I know the Squire likes you, and
notwithstanding the Aukwardness of his Proceeding, I am convinced
hath some hot Blood in his Veins, which will not let him rest, 'till
he hath communicated some of his Warmth to thee my little Angel; I
heard him last Night at our Door, trying if it was open, now to-night
I will take care it shall be so; I warrant that he makes the second
Trial; which if he doth, he shall find us ready to receive him. I
will at first counterfeit Sleep, and after a Swoon; so that he will
have you naked in his Possession: and then if you are disappointed, a
Plague of all young Squires, say I.----And so, Mrs. _Jervis_, says I,
you would have me yield myself to him, would you; you would have me
be a second Time a Fool for nothing. Thank you for that, Mrs.
_Jervis_. For nothing! marry forbid, says she, you know he hath large
Sums of Money, besides abundance of fine Things; and do you think,
when you have inflamed him, by giving his Hand a Liberty with that
charming Person; and that you know he may easily think he obtains
against your Will, he will not give any thing to come at all----.
This will not do, Mrs. _Jervis_, answered I. I Have heard my Mamma
say, (and so you know, Madam, I have) that in her Youth, Fellows have
often taken away in the Morning, what they gave over Night. No, Mrs.
_Jervis_, nothing under a regular taking into Keeping, a settled
Settlement, for me, and all my Heirs, all my whole Life-time, shall
do the Business----or else cross-legged, is the Word, faith, with
_Sham_; and then I snapt my Fingers.
_Thursday Night, Twelve o'Clock._
Mrs. _Jervis_ and I are just in Bed, and the Door unlocked; if my
Master should come----Odsbobs! I hear him just coming in at the Door.
You see I write in the present Tense, as Parson _Williams_ says.
Well, he is in Bed between us, we both shamming a Sleep, he steals
his Hand into my Bosom, which I, as if in my Sleep, press close to me
with mine, and then pretend to awake.--I no sooner see him, but I
Scream out to Mrs. _Jervis_, she feigns likewise but just to come to
herself; we both begin, she to becall, and I to bescratch very
liberally. After having made a pretty free Use of my Fingers, without
any great Regard to the Parts I attack'd, I counterfeit a Swoon. Mrs.
_Jervis_ then cries out, O, Sir, what have you done, you have
murthered poor _Pamela_: she is gone, she is gone.----
_O what a Difficulty it is to keep one's Countenance, when a violent
Laugh desires to burst forth._
The poor Booby frightned out of his Wits, jumped out of Bed, and, in
his Shirt, sat down by my Bed-Side, pale and trembling, for the Moon
shone, and I kept my Eyes wide open, and pretended to fix them in my
Head. Mrs. _Jervis_ apply'd Lavender Water, and Hartshorn, and this,
for a full half Hour; when thinking I had carried it on long enough,
and being likewise unable to continue the Sport any longer, I began
by Degrees to come to my self.
The Squire, who had sat all this while speechless, and was almost
really in that Condition, which I feigned, the Moment he Saw me give
Symptoms of recovering my Senses, fell down on his Knees; and O
_Pamela_, cryed he, can you forgive me, my injured Maid? by Heaven, I
know not whether you are a Man or a Woman, unless by your swelling
Breasts. Will you promise to forgive me: I forgive you! D--n you
(says I) and d--n you says he, if you come to that. I wish I had
never seen your bold Face, saucy Sow, and so went out of the Room.
_O what a silly Fellow is a bashful young Lover!_
He was no Sooner out of hearing, as we thought, than we both burst
into a violent Laugh. Well, says Mrs. _Jervis_, I never saw any thing
better acted than your Part: But I wish you may not have discouraged
him from any future Attempt; especially since his Passions are so
cool, that you could prevent his Hands going further than your Bosom.
Hang him, answered I, he is not quite so cold as that I assure you;
our Hands, on neither side, were idle in the Scuffle, nor have left
us any Doubt of each other as to that matter.
My Master sent for Mrs. _Jervis_ as soon as he was up, and bid her
give an Account of the Plate and Linnen in her Care; and told her, he
was resolved that both she and the little Gipsy (I'll assure him)
should set out together. Mrs. _Jervis_ made him a saucy Answer; which
any Servant of Spirit, you know, would, tho' it should be one's Ruin;
and came immediately in Tears to me, crying, she had lost her Place
on my Account, and that she should be forced to take to a House, as I
mentioned before; and that she hoped I would, at least, make her all
the amends in my power, for her Loss on my Account, and come to her
House whenever I was sent for. Never fear, says I, I'll warrant we
are not so near being turned away, as you imagine; and, i'cod, now it
comes into my Head, I have a Fetch for him, and you shall assist me
in it. But it being now late, and my Letter pretty long, no more at
_Your Dutiful Daughter_,
_Mrs._ LUCRETIA JERVIS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
Miss _Sham_ being set out in a Hurry for my Master's House in
_Lincolnshire_, desired me to acquaint you with the Success of her
Stratagem, which was to dress herself in the plain Neatness of a
Farmer's Daughter, for she before wore the Cloaths of my late
Mistress, and to be introduced by me as a Stranger to her Master. To
say the Truth, she became the Dress extremely, and if I was to keep a
House a thousand Years, I would never desire a prettier Wench in it.
As soon as my Master saw her, he immediately threw his Arms round her
Neck, and smothered her with Kisses (for indeed he hath but very
little to say for himself to a Woman.) He swore that _Pamela_ was an
ugly Slut, (pardon, dear Madam, the Coarseness of the Expression)
compared to such divine Excellence. He added, he would turn _Pamela_
away immediately, and take this new Girl, whom he thought to be one
of his Tenant's Daughters, in her Room.
Miss _Sham_ smiled at these Words, and so did your humble Servant,
which he perceiving, looked very earnestly at your fair Daughter, and
discovered the Cheat.
How, _Pamela_, says he, is it you? I thought, Sir, said Miss, after
what had happened, you would have known me in any Dress. No, Hussy,
says he, but after what hath happened, I should know thee out of any
Dress from all thy Sex. He then was what we Women call rude, when
done in the Presence of others; but it seems it is not the first
time, and Miss defended herself with great Strength and Spirit.
The Squire, who thinks her a pure Virgin, and who knows nothing of my
Character, resolved to send her into _Lincolnshire_, on Pretence of
conveying her home; where our old Friend _Nanny Jewkes_ is
Housekeeper, and where Miss had her small one by Parson _Williams_
about a Year ago. This is a Piece of News communicated to us by
_Robin_ Coachman, who is intrusted by his Master to carry on this
Affair privately for him: But we hang together, I believe, as well as
any Family of Servants in the Nation.
You will, I believe, Madam, wonder that the Squire, who doth not want
Generosity, should never have mentioned a Settlement all this while,
I believe it slips his Memory: But it will not be long first, no
doubt: For, as I am convinced the young Lady will do nothing
unbecoming your Daughter, nor ever admit him to taste her Charms,
without something sure and handsome before-hand; so, I am certain,
the Squire will never rest till they have danced _Adam_ and _Eve's_
kissing Dance together. Your Daughter set out Yesterday Morning, and
told me, as soon as she arrived, you might depend on hearing from
Be pleased to make my Compliments acceptable to Mrs. _Davis_ and Mrs.
_Silvester_, and Mrs. _Jolly_, and all Friends, and permit me the
Honour, Madam, to be with the utmost Sincerity,
_Your most Obedient_,
If the Squire should continue his Displeasure against me, so as to
insist on the Warning he hath given me, you will see me soon, and I
will lodge in the same House with you, if you have room, till I can
provide for my self to my Liking.
HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS _to_ LUCRETIA JERVIS.
I Received the Favour of your Letter, and I find you have not forgot
your usual Poluteness, which you learned when you was in keeping with
I am very much obliged to you for your Care of my Daughter, am glad
to hear she hath taken such good Resolutions, and hope she will have
sufficient Grace to maintain them.
All Friends are well, and remember to you. You will excuse the
Shortness of this Scroll; for I have Sprained my right Hand, with
boxing three new made Officers.--Tho' to my Comfort, I beat them all.
_Your Friend and Servant_,
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
I Suppose Mrs. _Jervis_ acquainted you with what past 'till I left
_Bedfordshire_; whence I am after a very pleasant Journey arrived in
_Lincolnshire_, with your old Acquaintance Mrs. _Jewkes_, who
formerly helped Parson _Williams_ to me; and now designs I see, to
sell me to my Master; thank her for that; she will find two Words go
to that Bargain.
The Day after my Arrival here, I received a Letter from Mr.
_Williams_, and as you have often desired to see one from him, I have
inclosed it to you; it is, I think, the finest I ever received from
that charming Man, and full of a great deal of Learning.
_O! What a brave Thing it is to be a Schollard, and to be able to
_Parson_ WILLIAMS _to_ PAMELA ANDREWS.
Having learnt by means of my Clerk, who Yesternight visited the
Rev^d. Mr. _Peters_ with my Commands, that you are returned into this
County, I purposed to have saluted your fair Hands this Day towards
Even: But am obliged to sojourn this Night at a neighbouring
Clergyman's; where we are to pierce a Virgin Barrel of Ale, in a Cup
of which I shall not be unmindful to celebrate your Health.
I hope you have remembered your Promise, to bring me a leaden
Canister of Tobacco (the Saffron Cut) for in Troth, this Country at
present affords nothing worthy the replenishing a Tube with.----Some
I tasted, the other Day at an Alehouse, gave me the Heart-Burn, tho'
I filled no oftner than five times.
I was greatly concerned to learn, that your late Lady left you
nothing, tho' I cannot say the Tidings much surprized me: For I am
too intimately acquainted with the Family; (myself, Father, and
Grandfather having been successive Incumbents on the same Cure, which
you know is in their Gift) I say, I am too well acquainted with them
to expect much from their Generosity. They are in Verity, as
worthless a Family as any other whatever. The young Gentleman I am
informed, is a perfect Reprobate that he hath an _Ingenium Versatile_
to every Species of Vice, which, indeed, no one can much wonder at,
who animadverts on that want of Respect to the Clergy, which was
observable in him when a Child, I remember when he was at the Age of
Eleven only, he met my Father without either pulling off his Hat, or
riding out of the way. Indeed, a Contempt of the Clergy is the
fashionable Vice of the Times; but let such Wretches know, they
cannot hate, detest, and despise us, half so much as we do them.
However, I have prevailed on myself to write a civil Letter to your
Master, as there is a Probability of his being shortly in a Capacity
of rendring me a Piece of Service; my good Friend and Neighbour the
Rev^d. Mr. _Squeeze-Tithe_ being, as I am informed by one whom I have
employed to attend for that Purpose, very near his Dissolution.
You see, sweet Mrs. _Pamela_, the Confidence with which I dictate
these Things to you; whom after those Endearments which have passed
between us, I must in some Respects estimate as my Wife: For tho' the
Omission of the Service was a Sin; yet, as I have told you, it was a
venial One, of which I have truly repented, as I hope you have; and
also that you have continued the wholsome Office of reading good
Books, and are improved in your Psalmody, of which I shall have a
speedy Trial: For I purpose to give you a Sermon next _Sunday_, and
shall spend the Evening with you, in Pleasures, which tho' not
strictly innocent, are however to be purged away by frequent and
sincere Repentance. I am,
_Sweet Mrs._ Pamela,
_Your faithful Servant_,
You find, Mamma, what a charming way he hath of Writing, and yet I
assure you, that is not the most charming thing belonging to him:
For, tho' he doth not put any Dears, and Sweets, and Loves into his
Letters, yet he says a thousand of them: For he can be as fond of a
Woman, as any Man living.
_Sure Women are great Fools, when they prefer a laced Coat to the
Clergy, whom it is our Duty to honour and respect._
Well, on _Sunday_ Parson _Williams_ came, according to his Promise,
and an excellent Sermon he preached; his Text was, _Be not Righteous
over much_; and, indeed, he handled it in a very fine way; he shewed
us that the Bible doth not require too much Goodness of us, and that
People very often call things Goodness that are not so. That to go to
Church, and to pray, and to sing Psalms, and to honour the Clergy,
and to repent, is true Religion; and 'tis not doing good to one
another, for that is one of the greatest Sins we can commit, when we
don't do it for the sake of Religion. That those People who talk of
Vartue and Morality, are the wickedest of all Persons. That 'tis not
what we do, but what we believe, that must save us, and a great many
other good Things; I wish I could remember them all.
As soon as Church was over, he came to the Squire's House, and drank
Tea with Mrs. _Jewkes_ and me; after which Mrs. _Jewkes_ went out and
left us together for an Hour and half--Oh! he is a charming Man.
After Supper he went Home, and then Mrs. _Jewkes_ began to catechize
me, about my Familiarity with him. I see she wants him herself. Then
she proceeded to tell me what an Honour my Master did me in liking
me, and that it was both an inexcusable Folly and Pride in me, to
pretend to refuse him any Favour. Pray, Madam, says I, consider I am
a poor Girl, and have nothing but my Modesty to trust to. If I part
with that, what will become of me. Methinks, says she, you are not so
mighty modest when you are with Parson _Williams_; I have observed
you gloat at one another, in a Manner that hath made me blush. I
assure you, I shall let the Squire know what sort of Man he is; you
may do your Will, says I, as long as he hath a Vote for
Pallamant-Men, the Squire dares do nothing to offend him; and you
will only shew that you are jealous of him, and that's all. How now,
Mynx, says she; Mynx! No more Mynx than yourself, says I; with that
she hit me a Slap on the Shoulder; and I flew at her and scratched
her Face, i'cod, 'till she went crying out of the Room; so no more at
_Your Dutiful Daughter_,
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
O Mamma! Rare News! As soon as I was up this Morning, a Letter was
brought me from the Squire, of which I send you a Copy.
_Squire_ BOOBY _to_ PAMELA.
I hope you are not angry with me for the Deceit put upon you, in
conveying you to _Lincolnshire_, when you imagined yourself going to
_London_. Indeed, my dear _Pamela_, I cannot live without you; and
will very shortly come down and convince you, that my Designs are
better than you imagine, and such as you may with Honour comply with.
_My Dear Creature_,
_Your doating Lover_,
* * * * *
Now, Mamma, what think you?----For my own Part, I am convinced he
will marry me, and faith so he shall. O! Bless me! I shall be Mrs.
_Booby_ and be Mistress of a great Estate, and have a dozen Coaches
and Six, and a fine House at _London_, and another at _Bath_, and
Servants, and Jewels, and Plate, and go to Plays, and Opera's, and
Court; and do what I will, and spend what I will. But, poor Parson
_Williams_! Well; and can't I see Parson _Williams_, as well after
Marriage as before: For I shall never care a Farthing for my Husband.
No, I hate and despise him of all Things.
Well, as soon as I had read my Letter, in came Mrs. _Jewkes_. You
see, Madam, says she, I carry the Marks of your Passion about me; but
I have received order from my Master to be civil to you, and I must
obey him: For he is the best Man in the World, notwithstanding your
Treatment of him. My Treatment of him, Madam, says I? Yes, says she,
your Insensibility to the Honour he intends you, of making you his
Mistress. I would have you to know, Madam, I would not be Mistress to
the greatest King, no nor Lord in the Universe. I value my Vartue
more than I do any thing my Master can give me; and so we talked a
full Hour and a half, about my Vartue; and I was afraid at first, she
had heard something about the Bantling, but I find she hath not; tho'
she is as jealous, and suspicious, as old Scratch.
In the Afternoon, I stole into the Garden to meet Mr. _Williams_; I
found him at the Place of his Appointment, and we staid in a kind of
Arbour, till it was quite dark. He was very angry when I told him
what Mrs. _Jewkes_ had threatned----Let him refuse me the Living,
says he, if he dares, I will vote for the other Party; and not only
so, but will expose him all over the Country. I owe him 150_l._
indeed, but I don't care for that; by that time the Election is past,
I shall be able to plead the _Statue_ of _Lamentations_.
I could have stayed with the dear Man forever, but when it grew dark,
he told me, he was to meet the neighbouring Clergy, to finish the
Barrel of Ale they had tapped the other Day, and believed they should
not part till three or four in the Morning----So he left me, and I
promised to be penitent, and go on with my reading in good Books.
As soon as he was gone, I bethought myself, what Excuse I should make
to Mrs. _Jewkes_, and it came into my Head to pretend as how I
intended to drown myself; so I stript off one of my Petticoats, and
threw it into the Canal; and then I went and hid myself in the
Coal-hole, where I lay all Night; and comforted myself with repeating
over some Psalms, and other good things, which I had got by heart.
In the Morning Mrs. _Jewkes_ and all the Servants were frighted out
of their Wits, thinking I had run away; and not devising how they
should answer it to their Master. They searched all the likeliest
Places they could think of for me, and at last saw my Petticoat
floating in the Pond. Then they got a Drag-Net, imagining I was
drowned, and intending to drag me out; but at last _Moll_ Cook coming
for some Coals, discovered me lying all along in no very good Pickle.
Bless me! Mrs. _Pamela_, says she, what can be the Meaning of this? I
don't know, says I, help me up, and I will go in to Breakfast, for
indeed I am very hungry. Mrs. _Jewkes_ came in immediately, and was
so rejoyced to find me alive, that she asked with great Good-Humour,
where I had been? and how my Petticoat came into the Pond. I
answered, I believed the Devil had put it into my Head to drown my
self; but it was a Fib; for I never saw the Devil in my Life, nor I
don't believe he hath any thing to do with me.
So much for this Matter. As soon as I had breakfasted, a Coach and
Six came to the Door, and who should be in it but my Master.
I immediately run up into my Room, and stript, and washed, and drest
my self as well as I could, and put on my prettiest round-ear'd Cap,
and pulled down my Stays, to shew as much as I could of my Bosom,
(for Parson _Williams_ says that is the most beautiful part of a
Woman) and then I practised over all my Airs before the Glass, and
then I sat down and read a Chapter in the Whole Duty of Man.
Then Mrs. _Jewkes_ came to me and told me, my Master wanted me below,
and says she, Don't behave like a Fool; No, thinks I to my self, I
believe I shall find Wit enough for my Master and you too.
So down goes me I into the Parlour to him. _Pamela_, says he, the
Moment I came in, you see I cannot stay long from you, which I think
is a sufficient Proof of the Violence of my Passion. Yes, Sir, says
I, I see your Honour intends to ruin me, that nothing but the
Destruction of my Vartue will content you.
_O what a charming Word that is, rest his Soul who first invented
How can you say I would ruin you, answered the Squire, when you shall
not ask any thing which I will not grant you. If that be true, says
I, good your Honour let me go home to my poor but honest Parents;
that is all I have to ask, and do not ruin a poor Maiden, who is
resolved to carry her Vartue to the Grave with her.
Hussy, says he, don't provoke me, don't provoke me, I say. You are
absolutely in my power, and if you won't let me lie with you by fair
Means, I will by Force. O la, Sir, says I, I don't understand your
paw Words.----Very pretty Treatment indeed, says he, to say I use paw
Words; Hussy, Gipsie, Hypocrite, Saucebox, Boldface, get out of my
Sight, or I will lend you such a Kick in the ---- I don't care to
repeat the Word, but he meant my hinder part. I was offering to go
away, for I was half afraid, when he called me back, and took me
round the Neck and kissed me, and then bid me go about my Business.
I went directly into my Room, where Mrs. _Jewkes_ came to me soon
afterwards. So Madam, says she, you have left my Master below in a
fine Pet, he hath threshed two or three of his Men already: It is
might pretty that all his Servants are to be punished for your
Harkee, Madam, says I, don't you affront me, for if you do, d--n me
(I am sure I have repented for using such a Word) if I am not
_How sweet is Revenge: Sure the Sermon Book is in the Right, in
calling it the sweetest Morsel the Devil ever dropped into the Mouth
of a Sinner._
Mrs. _Jewkes_ remembered the Smart of my Nails too well to go
farther, and so we sat down and talked about my Vartue till
Dinner-time, and then I was sent for to wait on my Master. I took
care to be often caught looking at him, and then I always turn'd away
my Eyes, and pretended to be ashamed. As soon as the Cloth was
removed, he put a Bumper of Champagne into my Hand, and bid me
drink----O la I can't name the Health. Parson _Williams_ may well say
he is a wicked Man.
Mrs. _Jewkes_ took a Glass and drank the dear _Monysyllable_; I don't
understand that Word, but I believe it is baudy. I then drank towards
his Honour's good Pleasure. Ay, Hussy, says he, you can give me
Pleasure if you will; Sir, says I, I shall be always glad to do what
is in my power, and so I pretended not to know what he meant. Then he
took me into his Lap.--O Mamma, I could tell you something if I
would--and he kissed me----and I said I won't be slobber'd about so,
so I won't; and he bid me get out of the Room for a saucy Baggage,
and said he had a good mind to spit in my Face.
_Sure no Man over took such a Method to gain a Woman's Heart._
I had not been long in my Chamber before Mrs. _Jewkes_ came to me,
and told me, my Master would not see me any more that Evening, that
is, if he can help it; for, added she, I easily perceive the great
Ascendant you have over him, and to confess the Truth, I don't doubt
but you will shortly be my Mistress.
What says I, dear Mrs. _Jewkes_, what do you say? Don't flatter a
poor Girl, it is impossible his Honour can have any honourable Design
upon me. And so we talked of honourable Designs till Supper-time. And
Mrs. _Jewkes_ and I supped together upon a hot buttered Apple-Pie;
and about ten o'Clock we went to Bed.
We had not been a Bed half an Hour, when my Master came pit a pat
into the Room in his Shirt as before. I pretended not to hear him,
and Mrs. _Jewkes_ laid hold of one Arm, and he pulled down the Bed
cloaths and came into Bed on the other Side, and took my other Arm
and laid it under him, and fell a kissing one of my Breasts as if he
would have devoured it; I was then forced to awake, and began to
struggle with him, Mrs. _Jewkes_ crying why don't you do it? I have
one Arm secure, if you can't deal with the rest I am sorry for you.
He was as rude as possible to me; but I remembered, Mamma, the
Instructions you gave me to avoid being ravished, and followed them,
which soon brought him to Terms, and he promised me, on quitting my
hold, that he would leave the Bed.
_O Parson_ Williams, _how little are all the Men in the World
compared to thee_.
My Master was as good as his Word; upon which Mrs. _Jewkes_ said, O
Sir, I see you know very little of our _Sect_, by parting so easily
from the Blessing when you was so near it. No, Mrs. _Jewkes_,
answered he, I am very glad no more hath happened, I would not have
injured _Pamela_ for the World. And to-morrow Morning perhaps she may
hear of something to her Advantage. This she may be certain of, that
I will never take her by Force, and then he left the Room.
What think you now, Mrs. _Pamela_, says Mrs. _Jewkes_, are you not
yet persuaded my Master hath honourable Designs? I think he hath
given no great Proof of them to-night, said I. Your Experience I find
is not great, says she, but I am convinced you will shortly be my
Mistress, and then what will become of poor me.
With such sort of Discourse we both fell asleep. Next Morning early
my Master sent for me, and after kissing me, gave a Paper into my
Hand which he bid me read; I did so, and found it to be a Proposal
for settling 250_l._ a Year on me, besides several other advantagious
Offers, as Presents of Money and other things. Well, _Pamela_, said
he, what Answer do you make me to this. Sir, said I, I value my
Vartue more than all the World, and I had rather be the poorest Man's
Wife, than the richest Man's Whore. You are a Simpleton, said he;
That may be, and yet I may have as much Wit as some Folks, cry'd I;
meaning me, I suppose, said he, every Man knows himself best, says I.
Hussy, says he, get out of the Room, and let me see your saucy Face
no more, for I find I am in more Danger than you are, and therefore
it shall be my Business to avoid you as much as I can; and it shall
be mine, thinks I, at every turn to throw my self in your way. So I
went out, and as I parted, I heard him sigh and say he was bewitched.
Mrs. _Jewkes_ hath been with me since, and she assures me she is
convinced I shall shortly be Mistress of the Family, and she really
behaves to me, as if she already thought me so. I am resolved now to
aim at it. I thought once of making a little Fortune by my Person. I
now intend to make a great one by my Vartue. So asking Pardon for
this long Scroll, I am,
_Your dutiful Daughter_,
HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS _to_ SHAMELA ANDREWS.
I Received your last Letter with infinite Pleasure, and am convinced
it will be your own Fault if you are not married to your Master, and
I would advise you now to take no less Terms. But, my dear Child, I
am afraid of one Rock only, That Parson _Williams_, I wish he was out
of the Way. A Woman never commits Folly but with such Sort of Men, as
by many Hints in the Letters I collect him to be: but, consider my
dear Child, you will hereafter have Opportunities sufficient to
indulge yourself with Parson _Williams_, or any other you like. My
Advice therefore to you is, that you would avoid seeing him any more
till the Knot is tied. Remember the first Lesson I taught you, that a
married Woman injures only her Husband, but a single Woman herself. I
am in hopes of seeing you a great Lady,
_Your affectionate Mother_,
HENRIETTA MARIA, _&c._
* * * * *
The following Letter seems to have been written before _Shamela_
received the last from her Mother.
SHAMELA ANDREWS _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
I Little feared when I sent away my last that all my Hopes would be
so soon frustrated; but I am certain you will blame Fortune and not
me. To proceed then. About two Hours after I had left the Squire, he
sent for me into the Parlour. _Pamela_, said he, and takes me gently
by the hand, will you walk with me in the Garden; yes, Sir, says I,
and pretended to tremble; but I hope your Honour will not be rude.
Indeed, says he, you have nothing to fear from me, and I have
something to tell you, which if it doth not please you, cannot
offend. We walked out together, and he began thus, _Pamela_, will you
tell me Truth? Doth the Resistance you make to my Attempts proceed
from Vartue only, or have I not some Rival in thy dear Bosom who
might be more successful? Sir, says I, I do assure you I never had a
thought of any Man in the World. How says he, not of Parson
_Williams_! Parson _Williams_, says I, is the last Man upon Earth;
and if I was a Dutchess, and your Honour was to make your Addresses
to me, you would have no reason to be jealous of any Rival,
especially such a Fellow as Parson _Williams_. If ever I had a
Liking, I am sure----but I am not worthy of you one Way, and no
Riches should ever bribe me the other. My Dear, says he, you are
worthy of every Thing, and suppose I should lay aside all
Considerations of Fortune, and disregard the Censure of the World,
and marry you. O Sir, says I, I am sure you can have no such
Thoughts, you cannot demean your self so low. Upon my Soul, I am in
earnest, says he,--O Pardon me, Sir, says I, you can't persuade me of
this. How Mistress, says he, in a violent Rage, do you give me the
Lie? Hussy, I have a great mind to box your saucy Ears, but I am
resolved I will never put it in your power to affront me again, and
therefore I desire you to prepare your self for your Journey this
Instant. You deserve no better Vehicle than a Cart; however, for once
you shall have a Chariot, and it shall be ready for you within this
half Hour; and so he flung from me in a Fury.
_What a foolish Thing it is for a Woman to dally too long with her
Lover's Desires; how many have owed their being old Maids to their
holding out too long._
Mrs. _Jewkes_ came me to presently, and told me, I must make ready
with all the Expedition imaginable, for that my Master had ordered
the Chariot, and that if I was not prepared to go in it, I should be
turned out of Doors, and left to find my way Home on Foot. This
startled me a little, yet I resolved, whether in the right or wrong,
not to submit nor ask Pardon: For that know you, Mamma, you never
could your self bring me to from my Childhood: Besides, I thought he
would be no more able to master his Passion for me now, than he had
been hitherto; and if he sent two Horses away with me, I concluded he
would send four to fetch me back. So, truly, I resolved to brazen it
out, and with all the Spirit I could muster up, I told Mrs. _Jewkes_
I was vastly pleased with the News she brought me; that no one ever
went more readily than I should, from a Place where my Vartue had
been in continual Danger. That as for my Master, he might easily get
those who were fit for his Purpose; but, for my Part, I preferred my
Vartue to all Rakes whatever----And for his Promises, and his Offers
to me, I don't value them of a Fig--Not of a Fig, Mrs. _Jewkes_; and
then I snapt my Fingers.
Mrs. _Jewkes_ went in with me, and helped me to pack up my little
All, which was soon done; being no more than two Day-Caps, two
Night-Caps, five Shifts, one Sham, a Hoop, a Quilted-Petticoat, two
Flannel-Petticoats, two pair of Stockings, one odd one, a pair of
lac'd Shoes, a short flowered Apron, a lac'd Neck-Handkerchief, one
Clog, and almost another, and some few Books: as, _A full Answer to a
plain and true Account_, &c. _The Whole Duty of Man_, with only the
Duty to one's Neighbour, torn out. The Third Volume of the
_Atalantis_. _Venus in the Cloyster: Or, the Nun in her Smock_.
_God's Dealings with Mr. Whitefield_. _Orfus and Eurydice_. Some
Sermon-Books; and two or three Plays, with their Titles, and Part of
the first Act torn off.
So as soon as we had put all this into a Bundle, the Chariot was
ready, and I took leave of all the Servants, and particularly Mrs.
_Jewkes_, who pretended, I believe, to be more sorry to part with me
than she was; and then crying out with an Air of Indifference, my
Service to my Master, when he condescends to enquire after me, I
flung my self into the Chariot, and bid _Robin_ drive on.
We had not gone far, before a Man on Horseback, riding full Speed,
overtook us, and coming up to the Side of the Chariot, threw a Letter
into the Window, and then departed without uttering a single
I immediately knew the Hand of my dear _Williams_, and was somewhat
surprised, tho' I did not apprehend the Contents to be so terrible,
as by the following exact Copy you will find them.
_Parson_ WILLIAMS _to_ PAMELA.
_Dear Mrs._ PAMELA,
That Disrespect for the Clergy, which I have formerly noted to you in
that Villain your Master, hath now broke forth in a manifest Fact. I
was proceeding to my Neighbour _Spruce's_ Church, where I purposed to
preach a Funeral Sermon, on the Death of Mr. _John Gage_, the
Exciseman; when I was met by two Persons who are, it seems, Sheriffs
Officers, and arrested for the 150_l._ which your Master had lent me;
and unless I can find Bail within these few Days, of which I see no
likelihood, I shall be carried to Goal. This accounts for my not
having visited you these two Days; which you might assure yourself, I
should not have fail'd, if the _Potestas_ had not been wanting. If
you can by any means prevail on your Master to release me, I beseech
you so to do, not scrupling any thing for Righteousness sake. I hear
he is just arrived in this Country, I have herewith sent him a
Letter, of which I transmit you a Copy. So with Prayers for your
Success, I Subscribe myself
_Your affectionate Friend_,
_Parson_ WILLIAMS _to_ SQUIRE BOOBY.
I am justly surprized to feel so heavy a Weight of your Displeasure,
without being conscious of the least Demerit towards so good and
generous a Patron, as I have ever found you: For my own Part, I can
_Nil conscire sibi nullæ pallescere culpæ._
And therefore, as this Proceeding is so contrary to your usual
Goodness, which I have often experienced, and more especially in the
Loan of this Money for which I am now arrested; I cannot avoid
thinking some malicious Persons have insinuated false Suggestions
against me; intending thereby, to eradicate those Seeds of Affection
which I have hardly travailed to sowe in your Heart, and which
promised to produce such excellent Fruit. If I have any ways offended
you, Sir, be graciously pleased to let me know it, and likewise to
point out to me, the Means whereby I may reinstate myself in your
Favour: For next to him, whom the Great themselves must bow down
before, I know none to whom I shall bend with more Lowliness than
your Honour. Permit me to subscribe myself,
_Your most obedient, and most obliged_,
_And most dutiful humble Servant_,
The Fate of poor Mr. _Williams_ shocked me more than my own: For, as
the _Beggar's Opera_ says, _Nothing moves one so much as a great Man
in Distress._ And to see a Man of his Learning forced to submit so
low, to one whom I have often heard him say, he despises, is, I
think, a most affecting Circumstance. I write all this to you, Dear
Mamma, at the Inn where I lie this first Night, and as I shall send
it immediately, by the Post, it will be in Town a little before
me.----Don't let my coming away vex you: For, as my Master will be in
Town in a few Days, I shall have an Opportunity of seeing him; and
let the worst come to the worst, I shall be sure of my Settlement at
last. Which is all, from
_Your dutiful Daughter_,
_P. S._ Just as I was going to send this away a Letter is come from
my Master, desiring me to return, with a large Number of Promises.--I
have him now as sure as a Gun, as you will perceive by the Letter
itself, which I have inclosed to you.
This Letter is unhappily lost, as well as the next which _Shamela_
wrote, and which contained an Account of all the Proceedings previous
to her Marriage. The only remaining one which I could preserve, seems
to have been written about a Week after the Ceremony was perform'd,
and is as follows:
SHAMELA BOOBY _to_ HENRIETTA MARIA HONORA ANDREWS.
In my last I left off at our sitting down to Supper on our Wedding
Night, where I behaved with as much Bashfulness as the purest
Virgin in the World could have done. The most difficult Task for me
was to blush; however, by holding my Breath, and Squeezing my Cheeks
with my Handkerchief, I did pretty well. My Husband was extreamly
eager and impatient to have Supper removed, after which he gave me
leave to retire into my Closet for a Quarter of an Hour, which was
very agreeable to me; for I employed that time in writing to Mr.
_Williams_, who, as I informed you in my last, is released, and
presented to the Living, upon the Death of the last Parson. Well, at
last I went to Bed, and my Husband soon leap'd in after me; where, I
shall only assure you, I acted my Part in such a manner, that no
Bridegroom was ever better Satisfied with his Bride's Virginity. And
to confess the Truth, I might have been well enough Satisfied too, if
I had never been acquainted with Parson _Williams_.
_O what regard Men who marry Widows should have to the Qualifications
of their former Husbands._
We did not rise the next Morning till eleven, and then we sat down to
Breakfast; I eat two Slices of Bread and Butter, and drank three
Dishes of Tea, with a good deal of Sugar, and we both look'd very
silly. After Breakfast we drest our selves, he in a blue Camblet
Coat, very richly lac'd, and Breeches of the same; with a Paduafoy
Waistcoat, laced with Silver; and I, in one of my Mistress's Gowns. I
will have finer when I come to Town. We then took a Walk in the
Garden, and he kissed me several times, and made me a Present of 100
Guineas, which I gave away before Night to the Servants, twenty to
one, and ten to another, and so on.
We eat a very hearty Dinner, and about eight in the Evening went to
Bed again. He is prodigiously fond of me; but I don't like him half
so well as my dear _Williams_. The next Morning we rose earlier, and
I asked him for another hundred Guineas, and he gave them me. I sent
fifty to Parson _Williams_, and the rest I gave away, two Guineas to
a Beggar, and three to a Man riding along the Road, and the rest to
other People. I long to be in _London_ that I may have an Opportunity
of laying some out, as well as giving away. I believe I shall buy
every thing I see. What signifies having Money if one doth not spend
The next Day, as soon as I was up, I asked him for another Hundred.
Why, my Dear, says he, I don't grudge you any thing, but how was it
possible for you to lay out the other two Hundred here. La! Sir, says
I, I hope I am not obliged to give you an Account of every Shilling;
Troth, that will be being your Servant still. I assure you, I married
you with no such view, besides did not you tell me I should be
Mistress of your Estate? And I will be too. For tho' I brought no
Fortune, I am as much your Wife as if I had brought a Million--yes,
but, my Dear, says he, if you had brought a Million, you would spend
it all at this rate; besides, what will your Expences be in _London_,
if they are so great here. Truly, says I, Sir, I shall live like
other Ladies of my Fashion; and if you think, because I was a
Servant, that I shall be contented to be governed as you please, I
will shew you, you are mistaken. If you had not cared to marry me,
you might have let it alone. I did not ask you, nor I did not court
you. Madam, says he, I don't value a hundred Guineas to oblige you;
but this is a Spirit which I did not expect in you, nor did I ever
see any Symptoms of it before. O but Times are altered now, I am your
Lady, Sir; yes to my Sorrow, says he, I am afraid--and I am afraid to
my Sorrow too: For if you begin to use me in this manner already, I
reckon you will beat me before a Month's at an end. I am sure if you
did, it would injure me less than this barbarous Treatment; upon
which I burst into Tears, and pretended to fall into a Fit. This
frighted him out of his wits, and he called up the Servants. Mrs.
_Jewkes_ immediately came in, and she and another of the Maids fell
heartily to rubbing my Temples, and holding Smelling-Bottles to my
Nose. Mrs. _Jewkes_ told him she fear'd I should never recover, upon
which he began to beat his Breasts, and cried out, O my dearest
Angel, Curse on my passionate Temper, I have destroy'd her, I have
destroy'd her!----would she had spent my whole Estate rather than
this had happened. Speak to me, my Love, I will melt myself into Gold
for thy Pleasure. At last having pretty well tired my self with
counterfeiting, and imagining I had continu'd long enough for my
purpose in the sham Fit, I began to move my Eyes, to loosen my Teeth,
and to open my Hands, which Mr. _Booby_ no sooner perceived than he
embraced and kissed me with the eagerest Extacy, asked my Pardon on
his Knees for what I had suffered through his Folly and Perverseness,
and without more Questions fetched me the Money. I fancy I have
effectually prevented any farther Refusals or Inquiry into my
Expences. It would be hard indeed, that a Woman who marries a Man
only for his Money, should be debarred from spending it.
Well, after all things were quiet, we sat down to Breakfast, yet I
resolved not to smile once, nor to say one good-natured, or
good-humoured Word on any Account.
_Nothing can be more prudent in a Wife, than a sullen Backwardness to
Reconciliation; it makes a Husband fearful of offending by the Length
of his Punishment._
When we were drest, the Coach was by my Desire ordered for an Airing,
which we took in it. A long Silence prevailed on both Sides, tho' he
constantly squeezed my Hand, and kissed me, and used other
Familiarities, which I peevishly permitted. At last, I opened my
Mouth first.--And so, says I, you are sorry you are married;--Pray,
my Dear, says he, forget what I said in a Passion. Passion, says I,
is apter to discover our Thoughts than to teach us to counterfeit.
Well, says he, whether you will believe me or no, I solemnly vow, I
would not change thee for the richest Woman in the Universe. No, I
warrant you, says I; and yet you could refuse me a nasty hundred
Pound. At these very Words, I saw Mr. _Williams_ riding as fast as he
could across a Field; and I looked out, and saw a Lease of Greyhounds
coursing a Hare, which they presently killed, and I saw him alight,
and take it from them.
My Husband ordered _Robin_ to drive towards him, and looked horribly
out of humour, which I presently imputed to Jealousy. So I began with
him first; for that is the wisest way. La, Sir, says I; what makes
you look so Angry and Grim? Doth the Sight of Mr. _Williams_ give you
all this Uneasiness? I am sure, I would never have married a Woman of
whom I had so bad an Opinion, that I must be uneasy at every Fellow
she looks at. My Dear, answer'd he, you injure me extremely, you was
not in my Thoughts, nor, indeed, could be, while they were covered by
so morose a Countenance; I am justly angry with that Parson, whose
Family hath been raised from the Dunghill by ours; and who hath
received from me twenty Kindnesses, and yet is not contented to
destroy the Game in all other Places, which I freely give him leave
to do; but hath the Impudence to pursue a few Hares, which I am
desirous to preserve, round about this little Coppice. Look, my Dear,
pray look, says he; I believe he is going to turn Higler. To Confess
the Truth, he had no less than three ty'd up behind his Horse, and a
fourth he held in his Hand.
Pshaw, says I, I wish all the Hares in the Country were d----d (the
Parson himself chid me afterwards for using the Word, tho' it was in
his Service.) Here's a Fuss, indeed, about a nasty little pitiful
Creature, that is not half so useful as a Cat. You shall not persuade
me, that a Man of your Understanding, would quarrel with a Clergyman
for such a Trifle. No, no, I am the Hare, for whom poor Parson
_Williams_ is persecuted; and Jealousy is the Motive. If you had
married one of your Quality Ladies, she would have had Lovers by
dozens, she would so; but because you have taken a Servant-Maid,
forsooth! you are jealous if she but looks (and then I began to
Water) at a poor P----a----a----rson in his Pu----u----u----lpit, and
then out burst a Flood of Tears.
My Dear, said he, for Heaven's sake dry your Eyes, and don't let him
be a Witness of your Tears, which I should be sorry to think might be
imputed to my Unkindness; I have already given you Some Proofs that I
am not jealous of this Parson; I will now give you a very strong one:
For I will mount my Horse, and you shall take _Williams_ into the
Coach. You may be sure, this Motion pleased me, yet I pretended to
make as light of it as possible, and told him, I was sorry his
Behaviour had made some such glaring Instance, necessary to the
perfect clearing my Character.
He soon came up to Mr. _Williams_, who had attempted to ride off, but
was prevented by one of our Horsemen, whom my Husband sent to stop
him. When we met, my Husband asked him how he did with a very
good-humoured Air, and told him he perceived he had found good Sport
that Morning. He answered pretty moderate, Sir; for that he had found
the three Hares tied on to the Saddle dead in a Ditch (winking on me
at the same time), and added he was sorry there was such a Rot among
Well, says Mr. _Booby_, if you please, Mr. _Williams_, you shall come
in and ride with my Wife. For my own part, I will mount on Horseback;
for it is fine Weather, and besides, it doth not become me to loll in
a Chariot, whilst a Clergyman rides on Horseback.
At which Words, Mr. _Booby_ leap'd out, and Mr. _Williams_ leap'd in,
in an Instant, telling my Husband as he mounted, he was glad to see
such a Reformation, and that if he continued his Respect to the
Clergy, he might assure himself of Blessings from above.
It was now that the Airing began to grow pleasant to me. Mr.
_Williams_, who never had but one Fault, _viz._ that he generally
smells of Tobacco, was now perfectly sweet; for he had for two Days
together enjoined himself as a Penance, not to smoke till he had
kissed my Lips. I will loosen you from that Obligation, says I, and
observing my Husband looking another way, I gave him a charming Kiss,
and then he asked me Questions concerning my Wedding-night; this
actually made me blush: I vow I did not think, it had been in him.
As he went along, he began to discourse very learnedly, and told me
the Flesh and the Spirit were too distinct Matters, which had not the
least relation to each other. That all immaterial Substances (those
were his very Words) such as Love, Desire, and so forth, were guided
by the Spirit: But fine Houses, large Estates, Coaches, and dainty
Entertainments were the Product of the Flesh. Therefore, says he, my
Dear, you have two Husbands, one the Object of your Love, and to
satisfy your Desire; the other the Object of your Necessity, and to
furnish you with those other Conveniences. (I am sure I remember
every Word, for he repeated it three Times; O he is very good
whenever I desire him to repeat a thing to me three times he always
doth it!) as then the Spirit is preferable, to the Flesh, so am I
preferable to your other Husband, to whom I am antecedent in Time
likewise. I say these things, my Dear, (said he) to satisfie your
Conscience. A Fig, for my Conscience, said I, when shall I meet you
again in the Garden?
My Husband now rode up to the Chariot, and asked us how we did--I
hate the Sight of him. Mr. _Williams_ answered very well, at your
Service. They then talked of the Weather, and other things, I wished
him gone again, every Minute; but all in vain I had no more
Opportunity of conversing with Mr. _Williams_.
Well; at Dinner Mr. _Booby_ was very civil to Mr. _Williams_, and
told him he was sorry for what had happened, and would make him
sufficient Amends, if in his power, and desired him to accept of a
Note for fifty Pounds; which he was so _good_ to receive,
notwithstanding all that had past; and told Mr. _Booby_, he hop'd he
would be forgiven, and that he would pray for him.
We make a charming Fool of him, i'fackins; Times are finely altered,
I have entirely got the better of him, and am resolved never to give
him his Humour.
_O how foolish it is in a Woman, who hath once got the Reins into her
own Hand, ever to quit them again._
After Dinner Mr. _Williams_ drank the Church _et cætera_; and smiled
on me; when my Husband's Turn came, he drank _et cætera_ and the
Church; for which he was very severely rebuked by Mr. _Williams_; it
being a high Crime, it seems, to name any thing before the Church. I
do not know what _Et cetera_ is, but I believe it is something
concerning chusing Pallament Men; for I asked if it was not a Health
to Mr. _Booby's_ Borough, and Mr. _Williams_ with a hearty Laugh
answered, Yes, Yes, it is his Borough we mean.
I slipt out as soon as I could, hoping Mr. _Williams_ would finish
the Squire, as I have heard him say he could easily do, and come to
me; but it happened quite otherwise, for in about half an Hour,
_Booby_ came to me, and told me he had left Mr. _Williams_, the Mayor
of his Borough, and two or three Aldermen heartily at it, and asked
me if I would go hear _Williams_ sing a Catch, which, added he, he
doth to a Miracle.
Every Opportunity of seeing my dear _Williams_, was agreeable to me,
which indeed I scarce had at this time; for when we returned, the
whole Corporation were got together, and the Room was in a Cloud of
Tobacco; Parson _Williams_ was at the upper End of the Table, and he
hath pure round cherry Cheeks, and his Face look'd all the World to
nothing like the Sun in a Fog. If the Sun had a Pipe in his Mouth,
there would be no Difference.
I began now to grow uneasy, apprehending I should have no more of Mr.
_Williams's_ Company that Evening, and not at all caring for my
Husband, I advised him to sit down and drink for his Country with the
rest of the Company; but he refused, and desired me to give him some
Tea; swearing nothing made him so sick, as to hear a Parcel of
Scoundrels, roaring forth the Principles of honest Men over their
Cups, when, says he, I know most of them are such empty Blockheads,
that they don't know their right Hand from their left; and that
Fellow there, who hath talked so much of _Shipping_, at the left Side
of the Parson, in whom they all place a Confidence, if I don't take
care, will sell them to my Adversary.
I don't know why I mention this Stuff to you; for I am sure I know
nothing about _Pollitricks_, more than Parson _Williams_ tells me;
who says that the Court-side are in the right on't, and that every
Christian ought to be on the same with the Bishops.
When we had finished our Tea, we walked in the Garden till it was
dark, and then my Husband proposed, instead of returning to the
Company, (which I desired, that I might see Parson _Williams_ again,)
to sup in another Room by our selves, which, for fear of making him
jealous, and considering too, that Parson _Williams_ would be pretty
far gone, I was obliged to consent to.
_O! what a devilish thing it is, for a Woman to be obliged to go to
bed to a spindle-shanked young Squire, she doth not like, when there
is a jolly Parson in the same House she is fond of._
In the Morning I grew very peevish, and in the Dumps, notwithstanding
all he could say or do to please me. I exclaimed against the
Priviledge of Husbands, and vowed I would not be pulled and tumbled
about. At last he hit on the only Method, which could have brought me
into Humour, and proposed to me a Journey to _London_, within a few
Days. This you may easily guess pleased me; for besides the Desire
which I have of shewing my self forth, of buying fine Cloaths,
Jewels, Coaches, Houses, and ten thousand other fine things, Parson
_Williams_ is, it seems, going thither too, to be _instuted_.
_O! what a charming Journey I shall have; for I hope to keep the dear
Man in the Chariot with me all the way; and that foolish Booby (for
that is the Name Mr._ Williams _hath set him) will ride on
So as I shall have an Opportunity of seeing you so shortly, I think I
will mention no more Matters to you now. O I had like to have forgot
one very material thing; which is that it will look horribly, for a
Lady of my Quality and Fashion, to own such a Woman as you for my
Mother. Therefore we must meet in private only, and if you will never
claim me, nor mention me to any one, I will always allow you what is
very handsome. Parson _Williams_ hath greatly advised me in this; and
says, he thinks I should do very well to lay out twenty Pounds, and
set you up in a little Chandler's Shop: but you must remember all my
Favours to you will depend on your Secrecy; for I am positively
resolved, I will not be known to be your Daughter; and if you tell
any one so, I shall deny it with all my Might, which Parson
_Williams_ says, I may do with a safe Conscience, being now a married
Woman. So I rest
_Your humble Servant_,
_P. S._ The strangest Fancy hath enter'd into my Booby's Head, that
can be imagined. He is resolved to have a Book made about him and me;
he proposed it to Mr. _Williams_, and offered him a Reward for his
Pains; but he says he never writ any thing of that kind, but will
recommend my Husband, when he comes to Town, to a Parson _who does
that Sort of Business for Folks_, one who can make my Husband, and
me, and Parson _Williams_, to be all great People; for he _can make
black white_, it seems. Well, but they say my Name is to be altered,
Mr. _Williams_, says the first Syllabub hath too comical a Sound, so
it is to be changed into _Pamela_; I own I can't imagine what can be
said; for to be sure I shan't confess any of my Secrets to them, and
so I whispered Parson _Williams_ about that, who answered me, I need
not give my self any Trouble; for the Gentleman _who writes Lives_,
never asked more than a few Names of his Customers, and that he made
all the rest out of his own Head; you mistake, Child, said he, if you
apprehend any Truths are to be delivered. So far on the contrary, if
you had not been acquainted with the Name, you would not have known
it to be your own History. I have seen a _Piece of his Performance_,
where the Person, whose Life was written, could he have risen from
the Dead again, would not have even suspected he had been aimed at,
unless by the Title of the Book, which was superscribed with his
Name. Well, all these Matters are strange to me, yet I can't help
laughing, to think I shall see my self in a printed Book.
* * * * *
So much for Mrs. _Shamela_, or _Pamela_, which I have taken Pains to
transcribe from the Originals, sent down by her Mother in a Rage, at
the Proposal in her last Letter. The Originals themselves are in my
hands, and shall be communicated to you, if you think proper to make
them publick; and certainly they will have their Use. The Character
of _Shamela_, will make young Gentlemen wary how they take the most
fatal Step both to themselves and Families, by youthful, hasty and
improper Matches; indeed, they may assure themselves, that all Such
Prospects of Happiness are vain and delusive, and that they sacrifice
all the solid Comforts of their Lives, to a very transient
Satisfaction of a Passion, which how hot so ever it be, will be soon
cooled; and when cooled, will afford them nothing but Repentance.
Can any thing be more miserable, than to be despised by the whole
World, and that must certainly be the Consequence; to be despised by
the Person obliged, which it is more than probable will be the
Consequence, and of which, we see an Instance in _Shamela_; and
lastly to despise one's self, which must be the Result of any
Reflection on so weak and unworthy a Choice.
As to the Character of Parson _Williams_, I am sorry it is a true
one. Indeed those who do not know him, will hardly believe it so; but
what Scandal doth it throw on the Order to have one bad Member,
unless they endeavour to screen and protect him? In him you see a
Picture of almost every Vice exposed in nauseous and odious Colours;
and if a Clergyman would ask me by what Pattern he should form
himself, I would say, Be the reverse of _Williams_: So far therefore
he may be of use to the Clergy themselves, and though God forbid
there should be many _Williams's_ amongst them, you and I are too
honest to pretend, that the Body wants no Reformation.
To say the Truth, I think no greater Instance of the contrary can be
given than that which appears in your Letter. The confederating to
cry up a nonsensical ridiculous Book, (I believe the most extensively
so of any ever yet published,) and to be so weak and so wicked as to
pretend to make it a Matter of Religion; whereas so far from having
any moral Tendency, the Book is by no means innocent: For,
_First_, There are many lascivious Images in it, very improper to be
laid before the Youth of either Sex.
_2dly_, Young Gentlemen are here taught, that to marry their Mother's
Chambermaids, and to indulge the Passion of Lust, at the Expence of
Reason and Common Sense, is an Act of Religion, Virtue, and Honour;
and, indeed the surest Road to Happiness.
_3dly_, All Chambermaids are strictly enjoyned to look out after
their Masters; they are taught to use little Arts to that purpose:
And lastly, are countenanced in Impertinence to their Superiors, and
in betraying the Secrets of Families.
_4thly_, In the Character of Mrs. _Jewkes_ Vice is rewarded; whence
every Housekeeper may learn the Usefulness of pimping and bawding for
_5thly_, In Parson _Williams_, who is represented as a faultless
Character, we see a busy Fellow, intermeddling with the private
Affairs of his Patron, whom he is very ungratefully forward to expose
and condemn on every Occasion.
Many more Objections might, if I had Time or Inclination, be made to
this Book; but I apprehend, what hath been said is sufficient to
persuade you of the use which may arise from publishing an Antidote
to this Poison. I have therefore sent you the Copies of these Papers,
and if you have Leisure to communicate them to the Press, I will
transmit you the Originals, tho' I assure you, the Copies are exact.
I shall only add, that there is not the least Foundation for any
thing which is said of Lady _Davers_, or any of the other Ladies; all
that is merely to be imputed to the Invention of the Biographer. I
have particularly enquired after Lady _Davers_, and dont hear Mr.
_Booby_ hath such a Relation, or that there is indeed any such Person
existing. I am,
_Most faithfully and respectfully_,
_Your humble Servant_,
_Parson_ TICKLETEXT _to Parson_ OLIVER.
I Have read over the History of _Shamela_, as it appears in those
authentick Copies you favour'd me with, and am very much ashamed of
the Character, which I was hastily prevailed on to give that Book. I
am equally angry with the pert Jade herself, and with the Author of
her Life: For I scarce know yet to whom I chiefly owe an Imposition,
which hath been so general, that if Numbers could defend me from
Shame, I should have no Reason to apprehend it.
As I have your implied Leave to publish, what you so kindly sent me,
I shall not wait for the Originals, as you assure me the Copies are
exact, and as I am really impatient to do what I think a serviceable
Act of Justice to the World.
Finding by the End of her last Letter, that the little Hussy was in
Town, I made it pretty much my Business to enquire after her, but
with no effect hitherto: As soon as I succeed in this Enquiry, you
shall hear what Discoveries I can learn. You will pardon the
Shortness of this Letter, as you shall be troubled with a much longer
very soon: And believe me,
_Your most faithful Servant_,
_P. S._ Since I writ, I have a certain Account that Mr. _Booby_ hath
caught his Wife in bed with _Williams_; hath turned her off, and is
prosecuting him in the spiritual Court.
Post date: 2015-12-01 21:34:51
Post date GMT: 2015-12-02 02:34:51
Post modified date: 2015-12-01 21